No, I am not “special”.  There are a LOT of people who have cancer.  It is unfortunate really.  How do we have all this technology but can’t figure out how the own human body destroys itself?  I see and hear more than ever people telling me their stories.  Complete strangers comfortable sharing what has happened to them.  How do I become more comfortable with the words and with my new self?  Does the anxiety ever go away?  I get nervous doing the easiest simplest tasks.  The only place I really feel comfortable with going to is the hospital.  I get nervous just opening up my front door.  What if someone sees me?  What are they thinking?  Why, do I even care what some stranger thinks?  That is so unlike me.  Where did my confidence go and will it ever come back?  There are a lot of people who have/had cancer.  How are they so comfortable with these words and I don’t even want to talk about it.  Hearing the words come out of my mouth makes me cringe.  I can’t look at people when I actually tell them.  The strange word cancer is now more apart of my vocabulary than ever before.